hands touch me against my will
I bat them away but they only hold me down
they penetrate every private part
I have no defense
I cry but no one hears
no one can help me drive these demons away
they are phantoms from the past
no real substance but what damage they do
I feel unclean
unworthy and unable
I hear the lies again
the cruel words that are my worst fear
And I still fear they will be true
Still feel they are sometimes true
Can never say they are without some trace of truth
for what I fear I have become
a slut
a whore with no conscience
only desiring to be desired
to please
to be a toy for whoever wants to play
and never saying no
because I feel I have no power
I feel I only have worth when
I am wanted
I have a fear and a dread of being a whore. Because of what happened to me and what was said to me as a young child. And I do let people use me and I hate myself for it.
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