Thursday, November 22, 2012

Time To Fly (POEM)

I don't know if it was watching The Raven (a movie about Poe solving murders done in the style of his stories), my melancholy mood brought on by holidays, or actually seeing a fly on the ceiling of my bathroom but this poem is purely a flight of fancy.  A morbid flight but nothing but a flight of fancy all the same.  I am not in the least bit suicidal.  That being said, I bring you... Time to fly!

 
Time to Fly
 
A fly crawled across the ceiling as my life ran out,
I watched it moving across the white ceiling with it's
swirled patterns.
It seems so strange to be mesmerized by a fly,
my last thoughts as I died.
I'd spent too many hours on the unhappy events of my life,
so many hours on guilt and despair,
and my last thought not of loved ones,
of those I left behind,
but of a fly crawling across the ceiling.
I chose death in this bathroom all blue and white,
the colors are peaceful I am told.
Peace washed over me as the blood ran out,
taking my life with it as it flowed down the drain.
I could not love myself,
and refused to believe anyone else could.
I longed to be adored,
cherished and protected.
It was not meant for me I suppose.
I hope they don't mourn too much,
those who believed they loved me.
I hope their thoughts of me are as inconsequential as a fly
crawling across a white swirled ceiling.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

A Jen Trouble Shooting Guide (POEM?)

A Jen Trouble Shooting Guide




If I get quiet and distant I probably feel insignificant
and I need to know I matter to you.

If I get bitchy and try to push you away, you're too close
and I'm scared.
 
If I get insecure and worry too much, if you can, be patient with me.
If I get over the top crazy and bouncing off the walls joking, most likely I am really sad and trying to shake off the blues.
If I ask you for a lot of feedback, your opinion matters to me. 
If I cry, hold me.
If I am ridiculous, don't laugh at me.
If I do something right, tell me.
If I give you my word, believe it.
If I am funny, laugh.
If I doubt myself, believe in me.
If I make myself vulnerable to you, don't reject me.
If I give you my heart, even if you can't accept it, don't break it when you give it back to me.
If I bring myself to care about you, it takes a lot to make me stop.
If you make a promise to me, keep it.
If I love you, I want the best for you, even if I am not it.
If I have a heavy heart, remind me of my blessings.
If I have a tale to tell, If I have a song to sing, listen.
If I smile at you, smile back.
If I try to get your attention, don't ignore me.
If I draw closer to you, don't push me away.
If I open myself up to you, don't shut me out.
If I trust you enough to show you who I am, don't try to change me.

Basically... love with me,laugh with me, live with me, enjoy me as I am or set me free so I can find someone who can!

(DAYS OF OUR SECOND LIVES) Episode One : Shorts!

SL IS Drama.  Some drama is just honest unfortunate blending of unsuited people.  Some is just malicious game playing and manipulation.  No matter the source or the reason drama drains us, distracts us and often holds us back from the future we dream of.

Unfortunately we can't totally avoid drama.  All we can do is seperate ourselves from the black holes.  You know, those people who live to suck the life out of you.

When I face a difficult situation I find if I can laugh, it all seems better.  Even if I am laughing at myself.  So here is my wink and nod at the drama of second life.  Often the drama in SL reminds me of a soap opera.  So here's mine:  DAYS OF OUR SECOND LIVES!!!!!

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real avatars, living or dead, is probably spot on... cough cough I mean purely coincidental!  *winks*

We open with one solitary figure.  She stands alone in a sandbox trying on outfit after outfit.  She seems content.  No one knows the turmoil that engulfs her. What in the world is she gonna do?  It seems she just can't find the right shorts to go with her new top!

GASP...DRAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!

In pops a very flamboyant Kitty...  "Lynnnnnnnn!" 

"Richard!"

"What's new?" 

"Oh Richard I can't find shorts to go with this top!  How am I going to make MrRightThisSecond fall in love with me nowwwwwwwwwwwwww?  He'll never love me and be faithful only to me and have pixel babies if I can't find the right shorts!!!!"

"This is a dilemna.  Never underestimate the importance of a good pair of shorts!  Oh dear I have to go.  Veronica needs me five seconds ago.  If I don't jump to her beck and call she might cancel our wedding... AGAIN!"

Will Lynn find the perfect shorts?  Will MrRightThisSecond succumb to her charms?  Will RichardKitty EVER get married?  Find out in the next exciting episode offfffff... DAYS OF OUR SECOND LIVES!